Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Since It's Not Anthrax, I'll Have To Go Shopping

Well, I didn't die from Anthrax yesterday, so that's probably a good thing. I do feel horribly like I have a man cold, though. Which I think is worse. Because at least with Anthrax there's an end in sight. With a man cold it could go on for days and days on end.

With all the whining, I can barely stand myself. My cats don't even want to cuddle with me. I should stay home today and hide under my covers, but I'm a glutton for punishment, so it'll be off to work for me.

I could probably turn it back into a regular cold if I did something very womanly. Like shopping. That's probably what I need to do. Shopping. Or find someone in my family to nag in a shrill voice. Oh, wait, but my throat is all scratchy and if I try to be shrill I'll just start coughing and then I'll fall right back into the man cold hell hole. No, that won't do. If I'm not going to spend the day cuddled under a warm blanket with hot peppermint tea, watching Johnny Depp and Vin Diesel movies, then it'll have to be shopping.

Well, you know what that means, then. If I'm going shopping, I must leave here and go find some cute shoes to wear. I mean, really. It's a requirement.

Wish me luck.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

It's Problemly Anthrax...And I Don't Mean The Band

From my Twitter stream this morning:

(Yes, it's backwards, ya'll, that's how Twitter works! I don't know why I say, ya'll, I'm not even from Texas, but I do. Deal with it.)

Cheryl3660: And now I'm on an FBI watch list because I said Anthrax on the internet 3 times and I wasn't even talking about music.

Cheryl3660: From Anthrax poisoning, because this couldn't possibly be a cold.

Cheryl3660: I'm sorry did I say "pay homage" out loud? I meant
"visit." You should all visit me before I die.

Cheryl 3660: Sore throat and a cough. Must be Anthrax
poisoning. You all should come pay homage to me on my deathbed.

And for those of you who are about to comment to me that "problemly" is not really a word . . . it is now: My spellcheck hasn't yet learned that problemly is a word either, so don't feel bad because you didn't know.

If no one finds this amusing other than me, I blame the cold. I mean Anthrax poisoning. SEE! It's affecting my ability to think clearly already!